hello peeps, wally here. mom went to run errands and left dad in charge, and thats when the good times roll. I love mom but she treats me like a little baby, baby, little baby – she puts up cardboard boxes blocking my access to all rooms but the kitchen and family room. while dad lets me explore, he treats me like a grown up. I love dad. he gets behind his computer and totally forgets about me so i can go on adventures. i walk from room to room smelling cool things. i crawled into erics open suitcase under his bed, found his leather belt, got myself comfortable, and started gnawing on it. it felt so good on my teeth. 10 minutes later i heard dad calling for me. I got really quiet because this was a great time for dad and me to play hide and seek. dad started yelling louder. “WALLY! THIS ISNT FUNNY!” i barked to let dad know where to find me. dad came running in the room…WALLY, I TOLD YOU TO STAY OUT OF TROUBLE. he dragged eric’s suitcase out from under the bed and there i was, laying on my tummy with erics belt in my mouth. i barked at him: peek-a-boo dad! dad asked me to open my mouth, he stuck in his giant fingers and made me gag, and he pulled out blobs of leather gunk. WALLY! he said, your tongue is red, mom is going to freak! dad carried me into the bathroom and started to wash my tongue with a wash cloth. i bit down on the wash cloth and dad’s finger. WALLY, THAT f*cking HURT! dad yelled. well dad how would like me to wash your tongue with a giant wash cloth. so while dad was putting a bandaid on his little boo-boo, he let me explore in the bathroom. after we were done, dad tucked me in for a nap and he went back to work. see the last pic? dad noticed i had red eye and freaked. he told me i had better not say anything to mom or he would blame me for doing bad shit with the belt and now i had pink eye. that’s all for tonight everyone. have a good night. Wally.

Wally’s Great Adventures (18). hello everyone, wally here. quick update before my afternoon nap. dad says that i can stop chewing on every damn thing anytime i was ready. cords. labels at the bottom of couches. legs of chairs. floor rugs. door stops. towels. tennis shoes. baskets. bags, oh bags, plastic, leather, paper, any kind of bag. floor plants. xmas tree (natch). but the best, dads draw strings on hoodies and sweatpants, dads slippers, dads socks, and dads fingers. and his giant hand. dads like to tease me with his finger, poking me, flipping me on my back, this game is fun for like 3 seconds and then i chomp down on him, break his skin and wont let go. dad yelps like a giant baby puppy, i bark at him and tell him to try manning-up. he mumbles something about biting the hands that feeds you. Anyhoo, its nap time. TGIF everyone. Have a good weekend. Wally.

 hello everyone, wally here. Just popped in to say hello. i went out for pee pee and it was so cold out. i was shivering and dad asked why as it was 45F outside. he said when he was a kid my age or a little bit older he used to walk to school all by himself in the winter in 3 foot deep snow and it was so much colder than this. mom snorted when she heard this. anyhoo, it ‘is’ cold out no matter what tough guy says. when i come in from the cold, i run quickly to each floor vent to see which one is blowing warm air and wherever my tushy feels warmest, i flop right down on that spot. It is so warm and toasty. 

and these vents are nice and all but nothing is like napping on dad’s lap when he is working. The tapping of the keys on the keyboard, dad chattering on the phone, soft music playing in the background (dad says van morrison), my eyes get heavy, and heavier and heavier and i fall asleep. i’m safe with dad, and i love him. Have a good day everyone. Wally & out.

 hello everyone, wally here. what a day. dad said i might think about chillin’ out a bit on sundays, it being sabbath and all. it all started this morning when mom tucked me in with dad after his morning walk. dad skooched me under his arm and i was ready to nap with him when i heard him sniffing. sniff. sniff. sniff. walter, what is that i smell? mom cleaned my bottom after i pooped so it wasn’t me. he pulled me up to his face, and sniffed me again. walter! have you been eating the christmas tree? oh that. dad found sap all over my face and he said i used to be cute now i just look like an idiot. he said he wouldn’t wash it off, and told mom she better not either. and when i’m sniffing dirt outside it was all going to stick to my face and i’d have to walk around dirty and all the other dogs would laugh at me. i barked at dad and said that wasn’t very nice, and said i would lick his face clean if he had shat on it.

then dad took me up to his office while he worked and i went exploring. i smelled juicy things in his trash can, tipped it over to find crumbs in all kinds of wrappers, kit kat bars, hersey almond chocolate bars, snicker bars, and so much other stuff. gees dad, snack much? dad turned around to find me rummaging around and said dont you dare eat that walter. you will die. whoa. a bit of drama, no dad? dad mumbled something about this house being a minefield…i didnt get it.

so dad had enough and took me downstairs when i managed to crawl into the dishwasher when he was eating his breakfast. dad turned around and said Walter, you’re exhausting…dad said that he should just shut me in the dishwasher and have it steam clean that sap off me. i barked at dad and said that sounded like fun. anyhoo, mom has brought the boxes full of Christmas tree ornaments up from the basement. tomorrow is going to be a HUGE day and i need to rest up. good night everyone. Wally and out. 

hello everyone. wally here. tgif!  guess what day it was? no, silly, not hump day. its cleaning day. mom found me in the closet on top of the swiffer box and she put me to work. i have noticed that dad is no where to be found on cleaning day, i think the real work is always done by mom since dad is the king.  i love mom. shes so nice. back to cleaning. while i was responsible for swiffing with the swiffer, she was running something called a vacuum, what a horrible, nasty and ugly machine.  i needed to save mom so i barked at it and kept biting the hose. for some reason mom kept telling me to stop it and that wasn’t nice when i was trying to save her. thats me below with the swiffer. i like to say swiffer. see how focused i am with the swiffer. [Read more…]

hello everyone, wally here. mom and i went to the vet today. had a poop test and it was clear of parasites. dad said that was because i keep shatting all over the house. oof. i got some shots which didn’t hurt that much esp since the nice ladies gave me all kinds of treats that i never get at home because of dads tight grip on my diet…he then lifts up his shirt to show me his belly and says this is what treats do, you don’t want that. he says i have to keep in tip top shape, this after mimi told him that a frenchie won a big dog show last weekend. dad said that i’ll be running circles around those other mutts in no time, and no dog of his will come in 2nd place… i’m feeling stress transference already. anyhoo, we’re mixing it up today by posting a vid. dad calls it the 8th wonder of the world. what’s that you might wonder? well dad calls wally eating his dinner something that everyone has to see at least once in their lifetime…and seeing it live is must see tv. mom says that when i’m really hungry and digging in, both of my back feet levitate. oh, i should explain that the food “dish” is called a ‘woof pet snuffle mat’ (yes, its a real thing) which teaches dogs how to forage. but that’s not the reason i have it. when dad was growing up on his farm one of his calves caught ruminal bloat and exploded, as he called it, from eating too much dewey grass too fast. so, dad buries each one of these food pebbles in different areas of the snuffle matt and i forage. he says i have to learn to slow down when i’m eating or i will explode too. he says that he’s never seen anything eat like me, a freak he calls it. I barked at him, you’re a freak dad, that wasn’t nice. anyway, those vet shots made me so tired. nap time. good night everyone. its wally and out.