October 9, 2016 by 34 Comments
Whether you snort white powder, or you shovel crystals down your gullet, the consequences are…
June-ish, 2016. It was the last leg of the morning commute, on I-287. The heart starts to race, this followed by a pinch, with its roots pushing outward like the tail of a lightning strike.
Doctor’s diagnosis: High Cholesterol. Root cause? Diet, with any 3 or 4 of following occurring on any given day:
- Yogurt. Fruit on the Bottom. Jacked up with two heaping tablespoons of Smucker’s Strawberry Jam.
- Fruit. Sliced bananas. Floating in Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup. Sliced strawberries, same. Blueberries, melon, raspberries, same.
- Hotcakes. With Canadian Maple Syrup, and a dollop of Raspberry jam.
- Drinks. Orange Gatorade. Florida Orange Juice from the carton. Artificially sweetened Lipton’s Green Tea, 2 bottles at a time. Diet Coke(s). Cranberry Juice, swigged from a 1 gallon jug. And oh let’s not forget, Welch’s Grape Juice, one could bathe in it.
- Ice Cream. Pint of creamy Chocolate Haggen Daz in a single sitting. Breyer’s Vanilla Ice Cream, topped with chopped nuts, chocolate sauce and several shots of Reddi Wip Cream.
- Coffee. Spiked with 2.0 (yes, two) packets of Nutrasweet or its brethren.
- Hot Tea. Golden Bee Honey from a squeeze bottle swirls to and coats the bottom.
- Snacks. Semi-sweet chocolate chips (in pantry for cooking) by the handful. Entenmann’s glazed donuts. Mini Snicker Bars by the handfuls.
- Sandwich. PBJ, mostly with J, oozing on all sides of enriched and wholesome white bread.
- Cereal. Including Raisin Bran, supplemented with a handful of California golden raisins and hopped up with a heaping teaspoon of white sugar crystals sweetening the 2%.
And the pre-bed-time sedative…which warrants its own paragraph, not a mere bullet. Grape Jelly trembles as it waits for the tablespoon to dig deep and scar its surface. Jelly coats the teeth and slides smoothly down the throat. A trace lingers on the lips. The body settles in, calm now, with its fix. Bed time. [Read more…]
July 5, 2016 by 46 Comments
1980’s: Replace butter with margarine. Overturned.
1990’s: Eliminate salt. Debunked.
2000’s: Eliminate/reduce carbs.
And today, the big news:
- “Eating pasta is not fattening and actually decreases the chances of becoming obese”
- “A new survey of more than 23,000 people, however, has linked pasta consumption to both lower body mass and waist-to-hip ratio.”
- “…also found that the correlation between pasta intake and lower obesity rates occurred independently of overall diet”
- “evidence that carbohydrates have been “unfairly demonised”.”=
- “the current trend of people cutting out pasta from their diets in an effort to lose weight was unjustified”
- “a fundamental component of Italian Mediterranean tradition, and there is no reason to do without it”
- results clearly show that it is wrong to demonise carbohydrates as the data clearly show that consumption of a carbohydrate-rich food such as pasta does not have an adverse effect on body weight.
Read more at The Telegraph: Eating pasta helps you lose weight, says Italian study
Moral of the story:
1) Wait long enough and it all comes home.
2) Back up the Pasta Truck.
3) Next up: Ice Cream.
Notes: (1) Thank you Rich for sharing the research. (2) Photo: Credit
June 28, 2016 by 9 Comments
I took a sideboard breakfast of scrambled eggs, thick-cut bacon, sausage, grits, peaches, figs, grapefruit, tomato juice, milk, and pumpkin muffins…
From my table I looked through long windows onto a tomato patch from the year before; a meadowlark let loose a piece of plaintive song in the mist, and a recognition moved in my memory as if I’d been here before.
~ William Least Heat-Moon, Blue Highways: A Journey into America.
May 12, 2016 by 24 Comments
March 21, 2016 by 14 Comments
It was a table laid for men of good will. Who could be the actual expected guests who hadn’t come? But it really was for us. So that woman gave away her best to just anyone? And contentedly washed the feet of the first stranger. Embarrassed, we stared. The table had been spread with a solemn abundance. Piled on the white tablecloth were stalks of wheat. And red apples, enormous yellow carrots, plump tomatoes nearly bursting their skin, watery-green chayote, pineapples malignant in their savagery, calm and orangey oranges, gherkins spiky like porcupines, cucumbers wrapped taut round their watery flesh, hollow red peppers that stung our eyes— all entangled with strands and strands of corn silk, reddish as near a mouth. And all those grapes. They were the deepest shade of purple grape and could hardly wait for the moment they’d be crushed. And they didn’t care who crushed them. The tomatoes were plump to please no one: for the air, for the plump air. […]
We kept eating. Like a horde of living beings, we gradually covered the earth. Busy like people who plow for their existence, and plant, and harvest, and kill, and live, and die, and eat.
~ Clarice Lispector, “The Sharing of Loaves.” The Complete Stories (New Directions. 2015)
December 19, 2015 by 42 Comments
The Fast was not part of any religious experience, ‘Tis the season, but the execution of a containment exercise. We order cocktails before dinner. Rachel was giddy in her counter: “the Dimwit thinks that skipping lunch is a Fast.” There’s no point in arguing with the closed-minded so I sit quietly sipping my tap water watching the mocking escalate, with Mother and Son now piling on. Who’s she calling a Dimwit? Who raised this thing?
Yet, I knew. I just knew, a bad outcome was coming. The late night dinner was preceded by a full day in the Sun and an empty stomach following the end of my Fast. My Fast.
I open with warm bread rolls (and who’s counting after three) – all carefully lathered with cheesy butter and baptized in virgin olive oil squeezed from some tree on an arid hill in Greece. This was followed with a Caesar salad, fresh crispy greens, a light-just-right Caesar dressing and razor thin strips of Parmesan cheese cultured from some cow grazing on a hillside in Southern Italy. The knife and fork then worked the entrée, a heaping portion of three-layered eggplant lasagna topped with cheese, broiled to a golden crisp.
This was chased down with three intermittent spoonfuls of Rachel’s garlic mashed potatoes, with the buttery succulence coating my tongue and lips. In my fourth attempt, the sharing was shut down: “Dad, ENOUGH!” – batting my spoon back and moving her dish beyond my reach. [Read more…]