10 hour car ride. In Both directions. In three days. Why drive, when you can fly?
Fighting traffic to airport. Finding parking in overflowing lots. Standing in interminable TSA security lines. Hard-back molded plastic seats, waiting. Delays. Waiting to board. Fighting for overhead bin space. No open seats. No legroom. Non-reclining seats. Unclean arm rests and seat tray tables. Claustrophobia. Acrophobia. And then, the other side. Waiting to deplane. Waiting for luggage. Dragging luggage to car rental, more waiting. And, then, a one-hour drive to Winston-Salem.
But “that” wasn’t it.
There was only this option, for this could be the last road trip with Family. Road trips with Family. McDonalds. Dad trying to make time, foot heavy on accelerator. Tummies full of soda, unscheduled bathroom breaks at highway rest stops. The Karaoke. The arm signals to Truckers urging a pull on the deep throaty air horns. The honking in tunnels. The spilled milkshakes. The spats in the back seat. Are we there yet? Budget hotels with swimming pools, had to have a swimming pool. Single rooms, twin beds with too-soft mattresses, undersized bathrooms, always two towels short. The thrill of Room Service. Kids petering out, little bodies sleeping side by side, their gentle puffs of breath, gone dreaming.
I turn my head to the window to look out at the rolling Blue Ridge Mountains, I wipe the tears, and step on the accelerator. Like a firework in the face. Accept our gratitude for the promise of a next chapter in life. And a next. And a next.¹
Graduation Day.
The procession. The speeches (who cares?). Birds, with the best seat in the house, flutter over 1200 graduates, and more than 2400 family members in the courtyard in an outdoor ceremony. The faculty sit on a grand stage, with big screens flanking each side with the show running real-time. The steeple of Wait Chapel soars above. Our Son sits rows ahead, sneaking sips of champagne from his deep pocketed robe. Text messages and photos fly in all directions.
I open the program, and run my index finger up and down the columns in search of his name. Bachelor of Science graduate, there he is. I pause for a moment, and continue. I pan over to the list of graduates with distinction. The Index finger slows this time, it’s a much shorter list. I jump 10 names at the time, the smooth gloss of the program electric on finger tips, my heart on fire now.
There he is:
Eric David Kanigan – Summa Cum Laude.
I drop my head, close the program, and close my eyes to staunch the flow. The hands clutch the thighs, but can’t intercede, the body trembles, running on its own now. Overwhelmed again.
That’s my Son.
He’s mine.
Notes:
- Photo: Eric, 5, at Kindergarten Graduation (1999) and Eric at College Graduation (May, 2016)
- Janet Frame and University Chaplain Reverend Tim Auman quotes. See attribution in prior post: The Baccalaureate Service. Like a firework in the face.
- Related Posts: Family
What a proud of moment… Congratulations to you ALL. Life begins now actually, for them of course. Thank you dear David, Blessing and Happiness, Love, nia
Thank you Nia. Yes, Yes it does begin.
Reblogged this on The Militant Negro™.
GREAT Piece, hits all the vitally important raw emotions of seeing your flesh & blood mature and progress.
Jueseppi, thank you for your kind words and for sharing. Means a lot.
Congratulations to Eric, his family and his Dad. . . he “gets it”.
Thank you Ray…
Btw… WF is my daughters number one choice for PA school.
Cool. She can’t go wrong with WF. Outstanding education, facilities and faculty.
This brought tears as we just had a very similar experience (including the Blue Ridge Mountains). Congratulations to Eric and to YOU!
Thank you Susan. It’s a special place (Blue Ridge Mountains) at a special time in our life.
Wake Forest, by any chance? My son was at UNCSA.
Yes!
Congratulations to your son! And to you… what a way of life and love – parenthood.
Have just started a reflection including this quote. Seems meant to share-
‘Grief and gratitude are kindred souls, each pointing to the beauty of what is transient and given to us by grace.’ (Patricia Carlson)
Thank you Carrie. Beautiful quote – “grief and gratitude are kindred souls” – I need to capture this quote for my collection. Thank you for sharing.
Will look forward to you ‘reflection’.
Just beautiful. The post. And the experience. 💘
Thank you Van. Appreciate the kind words.
Great job Eric! Great job Mom and Dad!:)
Thank you Brenda.
Absolutely loverly!!! Family road trips brought home a flood of memories. Why you were just a ‘lil fur piece’ down the road from me…here in these magical Blue
Ridge Mountains!
Thank you Freddie. I had no idea we were so close to you! “lil fur piece” – love that!
Wonderful. Congratulations all round. What a clever son you’ve raised, I’m sure always showing him the greatest love and encouragement.
Awww, thank you for the kind words Sarah.
Thank you for sharing all of this David. So many memories brought back to me because of this you have shared. I feel the love for those times all over again so strongly. So happy for you and your family. <3
Thank you Peg. Appreciate it.
Congrats! Go Deacs!
Thank you Len!
Congratulations David !!!
Thank you Lou!
The perfect post with which to slip back into the fold…this is beautiful and for that I will forgive you for making me cry at 5:30 am. Congrats Papa…what a milestone!!
He looks a lot like you, David.! 😉
What a thrill for you and for Eric. How proud you must feel. And so, another chapter begins. Thankfully we (parents) get to witness the ups, the downs, and the in-betweens. Right there in the midst of it all… Wouldn’t have it any other way…
Thank you Carolyn. We certainly get to ride the ups and downs…and I too, wouldn’t have it any other way.
The perfect post with which to slip back into the fold. Beautiful and for that I’ll forgive you for making me cry at 5’30 am. Congrats Papa, what a milestone!
Awwww, thank you Bonnie. Great to have you back.
Thank you friend…I’ve missed being here!! It’s been a maelstrom of sick, travel, work, injury, work…sigh. But summer is almost upon us! 🙂
Wow, I’m fatigued just reading about your maelstrom – I hope you are back at full strength!
Getting there!! 🙂 and thank you!
Congrats and many blessings! Exciting times…glancing back, looking ahead, and realizing how damn fast it all goes. Got a lump in my throat reading this, pal. Hope you’ll keep us posted on Eric’s next chapter. I’ve no doubt he’ll continue to make you proud…
Smiling. Thank you Lori. Now his real work starts! 🙂
Congratulations to Eric and all of you! May he continue to make you proud! Blessings and exciting times ahead!
Thank you Vera.
All so beautiful and heartwarming.
Congratulations,
to all of you, again.
Thank you Sawsan!
Well, that made me cry. Congratulation!
Thank you Maralee!
it comes like a tsunami.
It does!
That mama’s boy? He’s his father’s son too…so much to be proud of…
Smiling. Yes, you remember. He is Mama’s Boy!
😉
Heartwarming, David. Great moments to remember while looking fwd to the next step, and the next. Congratulations to Eric & you all!
Thank you Helen.
Congratulations to both of you, Proud Dad!
Thank you Russ!
Gorgeous and Clever! How exciting for you all and it is in these precious moments we remember, why we love and stay present with each other. I wish Eric every success in life.
Thank you Karen
Congrats to you and to Eric.Oh yeah, his mother probably deserves some credit, and his sister for putting up with him. 😉
Thank you Anneli. Mom did most of the heavy lifting.
And Dad was there for moral support. Very important.
You may have staunched the flow when reading Eric’s name…with distinction. I couldn’t so didn’t. There you have it. A confession from the heart….remembering my own two…so long ago and still it seems just yesterday….two grandchildren ago. Memories etched and embraced forever.
Beautiful. Thanks for sharing Raye.
Congrats to the entire family. Amazing how time flies. I recall your earlier posts when he started college. Bonne chance a tous
Thank you Michael. It was a blur.
Dave, Thank you for sharing about your bright, well rounded and handsome son… in sharing your heart in such a loving, honoring and beautiful manner, we witness an extension of your soul…Children are such a blessed gift and such a tremendous, lovely responsibility …Eric has has worked hard and is joyful…You and Susan have gifted your children with the benefit of two loving, intelligent parents with great sensitivity, creativity, morals and sense of humor…well done, beaming parents!! and Miss Rachel is I am sure very stoked for her brother 🙂 May he continue to do well, stand tall on his own two feet, learn by doing, seek your advice when needed and keep God in the forefront…Kindly and much Joy to you and your family, Christie
Thank you for the kind and gentle words Christie
I know!! Carrie’s words say everything.. Oh my. Well done everyone !
Thank you Makere
Time flies!!! Congrats to the family!
It does! Thanks Paco
And in a blink, here we are – Kindergarten to Adult life! Bravo! Mom & Dad, take a bow, too ~ and savor all of these moments 🙂 MJ
Yes. Blink and we are here. Thank you MJ
Congratulations to Eric and your family, David! I’ve enjoyed sharing thischapter with you and look forward to the next chapter and the next…..
Thank you Carolann. Appreciate it!
Did you get rid of your “like” button, buddy?
Did not!
I’m not finding it on any of the blogs I read. Hmm…
Hmmm. Let me check. Thanks for the heads up Sandy.
Beautiful…just last weekend we were at our oldest son’s graduation from Vanderbilt University. I can relate to so much…the road trip, the ceremony, the program, the flow…ugh my heart!!! Congratulations to you all!
Thank you Lolo!
One of the greatest moments in a father’s life. Graduation from college is a significant accomplishment. A sobering moment for a dad whose steering hand can somehow be seen in a son’s success.
Congrats to Eric and to you Dave; your name will be forever along side his on that diploma.
-Alan
So true Alan. Thank you. Wonderful comment.
Congratulations, David. What a beautiful, real post. Your pride is jumping off the page. Beautiful.
Thank you Vicki. Appreciate the kind words. It was an emotional experience, and one that won’t replay…(unfortunately)