Walking Cross-Town. Waxing and Waning.

Simon Birch

It’s Tuesday. 6 am.
The Metro-North train arrives at Grand Central.
I’m walking across town.
It’s there.
I’m, Unstoppable.

Today. It’s back.
The energy geyser bursting from the Center.
The Possibilities? Endless.
Hope?  Springs eternal.
Mystery source?  Soul. Powered. Soulerpowered.*

Other days.
The cauldron bubbles.
The witches’ brew stews.
Lethargy. Worry. Anxiety. Fatigue. Doubt.
Fully Present, in a Civil War of One.
It? It’s just not there.

William James had a bead on it.  The Human energizing. The sum-total of activities. Some outer. Some inner. Some muscular. Some emotional. Some moral. Some spiritual.  The waxing and waning in himself he is at times so well aware.  How to keep it an appreciable maximum? How not to let the level lapse? That is the great problem.

I feel this lapsing.
Mr. Miyagi’s Wax On, Wax off.

James continues: Everyone is familiar with feeling more or less alive on different days.  Every one knows on any given day that there are energies slumbering in him which the incitements of that day do not call forth, but which he might display if these were greater. Most of us feel as if a sort of cloud weighed upon us, keeping us below our highest notch of clearness in discernment, sureness in reasoning, or firmness in deciding. Compared with what we ought to be, we are only half awake. Our fires are damped, our drafts are checked. We are making use of only a small part of our possible mental and physical resources.

We are only half awake. Our fires are damped. We’re making use of only a small part of our potential.
But, James left out the punch line:
He can be a miserable S.O.B. on Wax off days.

How not to let the level lapse? That is the great problem.
He needs to Switch It On. And Kill the Lapse.
Get up. Shower. Brush his teeth.
And before he walks out that door, Click!
And Here it Comes:

What rising?
What memory of ocean?
What is it ripples and rises?
The drowned heart, lifted a moment
answers clearly.
Here it comes.

~ Muriel Rukeyser, from “Adventure at Midnight” – Poetry  (May 1936)


Notes:

18 thoughts on “Walking Cross-Town. Waxing and Waning.”

  1. That is an inspired piece that we all can relate to at times. I have to ride that wave of energy as it presents itself…as do we all, if we pay attention. ☺

  2. Beautifully done – first time Mr. Miyagi and Mr. James come together to create this palpable reality…I love it.

  3. WMS, WMS, another tour de force prompted by perambulation, pal! Seriously, *fabulous,* and infinitely more eloquent than what I’ve been feeling all week: “My giddy-up has gone…” 😉

    1. Smiling. Thank you Lori. I had to look up perambulation. Great word added to vocabulary. Thank you for expanding my vocab and for the kind words!

  4. All things have ebbs and flows of intensified purpose. The tides have highs and lows. The moon waxes and wanes. Yet their purpose and connection is stiil clear.

    God in creation established the hierarchy of the cosmos and the world in an orderly manner, with the lifting and lowering of a veil to begin anew and bring and end to each effort when a good had been accomplished. And even when He was satisfied, He rested; of course, not in the sense as we know rest.

    He has not only created but also conserved all things. We still are, because He still is. As is true of ourselves.Simply because we have a temporary lack of enthusiasm, or take a rest, doesn’t mean we are in danger of forfeiting our purpose. Even a sculptor steps back from his work to decide what he must do next.

    -Alan

    1. “Even a sculptor steps back from his work to decide what he must do next.” Loved your entire comment but your close, packed a punch. Thanks Alan.

  5. Your high flying attitude makes me smile and reminds me of one of my favorite quote…”You’ve got to get up every morning with a smile on your face and show the world all the love in your heart” Carole King I try to follow C. Kings advise. Some days more of a challenge than others and some day are just extra wonderful..

  6. “Fully Present, in a Civil War of One.” – Love that David, and I completely understand. And I also love “The drowned heart, lifted a moment answers clearly.” 🙂

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