Truth

thank-you

Excerpts from wsj.com: Six luminaries to weigh in on a single topic. This month: Manners:

“When you speak to people of my generation, you’ll find that our parents didn’t talk to us about things; they just told us what to do. From morning until night, you were issued instructions. Seventy-five percent of those instructions had to do with manners—don’t reach in front of another person, elbows off the table. As a result, you had a certain way of seeing the world. I went to the Nobel Prize ceremony with Toni Morrison the year she won. I got up at one point during the dinner to talk with the wife of an editor at Knopf. But when I got to her, she practically shoved me to the ground and said, ‘Don’t you know you can’t stand up when the king is sitting down?’ Well, no, I didn’t know that. How would I know that? Of all the things my mother told me, that is one thing she missed. But other than that I pretty much know everything!”

— Fran Lebowitz is a writer and social commentator.

“When I was a child, my parents used to take me out to a restaurant once a week, even though they didn’t necessarily have the means. Restaurants are a wonderful space for a child to learn the value of good behavior because, in dining, the rules of etiquette are built on respect….

— Charles Masson is a restaurateur. His latest project, Majorelle, opens in December at the Lowell Hotel in New York City.

“My husband and I have four sons and two grown grandchildren. Good manners were as important to their education as their schooling. When our grandchildren came to our house, their parents would say, ‘Mind your Mimi’s manners!’ It’s all about treating people with courtesy and kindness. […] If ever I’m asked an ill-mannered question, I just say, ‘I’ll forgive you for asking me that question if you’ll forgive me for not answering it…’

—Lynn Wyatt is a philanthropist and socialite.


Image: kate spade new york

He’s playing the long game

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“Justin Timberlake, 32, is playing the long game. He’s the Kasparov of showbiz. He has survived far longer than most artists, tracing an arc from pop-culture absurd — first appearing on the Mickey Mouse Club at age 11 — to pop-culture sublime, a solo career that has triumphed at a time when entertainment, and celebrity, have become more disposable than ever…

Timberlake, it has been said, has gone far on likability, which is also a way of mildly patronizing him…But what has let him bridge over multiple iterations and now three generations of fans has been a certain kind of generationally specific decorum: gracious, polite, patient, deferential. He may have you naked by the end of this song, but he will do so using Antioch rules.”

(Timberlake) ‘Y’know, life doesn’t happen in black and white.’ The gray area is where you become an adult . . . the medium temperature, the gray area, the place between black and white. That’s the place where life happens.”

~ The New York Times Style Magazine: The Enduring, Multigenerational Appeal of Justin Timberlake


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Chekhov on the 8 Qualities of Cultured People

Anton-Chekhov

It was 127 years ago.  Chekhov was 26 years old when he wrote a letter to his 28-year old brother outlining the eight qualities that must be satisfied for people to be cultured.

Anton Pavlovich Chekhov  (1860-1904) was a Russian physician and author who is considered to be among the greatest writers of short stories in history.  He practiced as a doctor throughout most of his literary career stating: ‘Medicine is my lawful wife.  And, literature is my mistress.'”

A excellent post by Brain Pickings shares excerpts from Chekhov’s letter to his brother.  The post is worth reading in its entirety.  Here are a few of my favorites:

“Cultured people must, in my opinion, satisfy the following conditions:

1) They respect human personality, and therefore they are always kind, gentle, polite, and ready to give in to others…

2) They have sympathy not for beggars and cats alone…They sit up at night in order to help to pay for brothers at the University, and to buy clothes for their mother. Continue reading “Chekhov on the 8 Qualities of Cultured People”