Sitting on that height, facing the brightening light, this is what I understood, not as a proposition of words, but as if it had taken full occupancy of my mind in a moment, as an image might occupy it, or a mathematical proof. Afterwards, when I translated what I had experienced, what I wrote had none of the force of what had happened. A long life and a short life are the same, because the present is the only life we have – the same for everyone. It was like a description of music. As the light poured into my eyes, exciting their nerves, causing reactions in the brain, the reactions gave rise to something beyond any contentment – a submission, blissful. The moment of the present becomes instantly the past, I wrote. The present was almost-nothing; I was almost-nothing – a momentary arrangement of energy. And when the time came for the arrangement of energy that went by my name to collapse, and become a different arrangement, barely anything would be changed. A slight readjustment of a few lives, for a while. Some after-life in the memory of a small number of people, for some of whom I was already nothing but a memory. Into the great indifference, I wrote, but the words caused a chill, a shiver, which I had not experienced in those minutes at the ruins. Everything is becoming – nothing rests, I added, on the next line. A less discomfiting formulation. At the ruins, I witnessed transition in everything: the slow movement of the clouds, the slower rising of the sun, the agitation of the sea. I witnessed it and felt it: with each breath, each heartbeat, I was changing, a changing thing among other things that were changing. More: as I gazed at that uncertain horizon, across the glowing water and the glowing leaves, the elements of the scene lost their separation. All categories and names were lost in the totality of it, dissolved in the light. This was how the episode achieved its climax, in an overwhelming acceptance. An Amen of sorts. That was what I wrote. ‘Ataraxia’ is a word I might have used, had it been at my disposal then.
An awareness of discomfort brought me back to myself – I had to stand up. One leg had become numb. True contemplatives are made of tougher stuff, I was soon telling myself, on the descent. As I picked my way down the crumbling path, I was starting to make phrases. A long life and a short life are the same was composed before I reached the car. As was Life – the intermission. And the ten-minute mystic. There has been nothing like it since. Not even ten minutes.
Standard reality reasserted itself promptly.
— Jonathan Buckley, One Boat: A Novel (W.W. Norton & Company, November 4, 2025)
Notes:
- Book Reviews Cafe: “Review: One Boat by Jonathan Buckley“
- Post Title & Inspiration: Aldous Huxley: “It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply. Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them.
“Everything is becoming..”. So many amazing thoughts offered with such ease and universal in scope. I don’t know how you are able to read as much as you do, but I definitely appreciate it.
Thank you Mimi.
“A long and a short life are the same”
Did you read or listen to Dick Van Dykes interview regarding turning 100? He has the best line…. “100 years isn’t enough”….
Thank you for this David. Happy Friday.
Yes. He’s an inspiration.
it sounds very close to how I’ve heard people describe near death experiences
Yes. Me too Beth.
“A long life and a short life are the same, because the present is the only life we have – the same for everyone.”
This concept of “the present moment is all there is“ is emphasized over and over again in the meditation teachings that are in the Headspace app that I use.
(As of yesterday I have meditated 112 days in a row… Sometimes for 20 minutes, other times for only 5… I do find it calming when I am experiencing anxiety or depression. The ultimate goal is to keep your mind focused on the present moment all the time, not just during meditation sessions. I’m finding 20 minutes to be more than challenging enough right now lol.)
112 days in a row. Wowza. Great for you Paul. Well done.
Thanks for the kind words, Dave. I read that the Dalai Lama meditates for four hours every day. He goes to bed at 7 PM, wakes up and meditates from 3 AM to 7 AM, and the following 12 hours are what most of us would consider “regular life”.
Wow. 4 hours a days. I can’t eat for that long although I try and try .
LOL!!
Well done Paul! Remember the practice is the doorway to the state of atraxia. (Love that word now I’ve found it). It isn’t the amount of time spent in trying to get there, but the ability to reach it more and more until we open to Source and embrace the love and understanding that is here. 💞
🙏💕🙏
Interesting to read the thoughts behind the words. It was a profound experience for him. Ataraxia is a new word for me. Also interesting. It refers to a completely calm state of being, which some interpret as apathy… I don’t agree. It’s a gateway to a higher state of consciousness and appreciation of life itself.
New word for me to Val. And agree with you.
Hi There,
Thank you for linking my blog 🙂
– BookReviewsCafe( Swapna Peri)
My pleasure. Thank you. Great review.