Running. And Free Fallin’.

in-the-snow-ix

Let’s take inventory.

Four Falls.
The heals of both hands scraped raw, instruments used to break each fall.
A right knee bruise. Severity? Somewhere on a continuum between Deep and below the surface. We’ll know for sure in the morning.

We are a self-correcting, self-learning being, right? Otherwise we wouldn’t be standing, breathing, and reading this, Right?

Adam, in his hunt for food for Eve and the kids, after falling face-first the first time, said, hmmmm, that didn’t feel good. That didn’t work out. Let’s not do that again.

24° F. It’s the first snow of the season and I’m prepping.

Underwear. Thermal Underwear. Thermal Socks. Thermal undershirt. Wicking overshirt. Heavy Down coat. Tuke. Gloves. Fanny Pack with bottle of water, smartphone and headphones.

I catch a glimpse of this package in the mirror before stepping into the garage. Holy Sh*t. Sasquatch.

I pull on Ugg Boots, two pound leg weights strapped on each foot. Who runs in snow in Ugg Boots? 

First fall.
A flat surface, I’m caught by surprise. An ice patch. The legs fly out. I fall heavily on left side, air gushes out of the belly, which is still jiggling. I roll on my back.  Where’s my smartphone? Right pocket please. Right.

Second fall.
A steep incline. Uggs are crampon-less. Right leg slides out. Left leg follows, and a tumble down a short embankment.  I’m covered in a mixture of snow, leaves and dirt. Camouflage. Military drills. No, more like Carl Spackler the greenskeeper on Caddyshack: “They’re like the Viet-Cong…Varmint-Cong. So you have to fall back on superior firepower and superior intelligence. And that’s all she wrote.”

Third fall.
A steep decline. My right toe, the UGG-Cap, clips a stone, the left foot desperately stretches to find a firm footing – and instead, crashes through the soft snow and lands on several inches of wet leaves. Think three meter springboard.  I’m airborne – hands are out to brace impact – lightly child, lightly – stones find the fatty flesh of the palms of both hands.

It’s the Last Mile, short of the mileage target planned for the morning run, but it’s over and I’m looping back to the car.  My head is down, my eyes are locked on the snow covered trail, hopelessly searching for protruding dangers.  Sweat spills out from under the Tuke – the rad is overheating from the heavy clothing, the heavy boots.

The Final fall.
I see the rock, a threatening hump covered in snow. I lift my right foot to clear it – I fail. You’ve got to be f**king kidding me. I crumple on the path at the entrance of the park.

“Hey, do you need some help?”

I look up, grimacing: “No thanks. I’m OK.” What kind of ass*ole can’t clear a 4″ stone. I let him pass and let the humiliation burn off before getting up.

I’m standing in the shower, steam fills the bath, and the eyes are closed…and I squeeze the right foot, the left foot, and then each leg, the arms and then the chest. Body aches feel good.

Gotta get this body rested.

We’re going at it again tomorrow.

Nap time.

10,236 steps.


Notes:

 

 

Comments

  1. Ouch!! Over 10k in these conditions deserves to be multiplied by at least a factor of 3. I’m off to scrape off the snow from the car in snow filled Albany NY. Steps will be in the mall today. I’m hoping it’s safer!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I get it. Most of my serious running was when we lived in the Pocono Mountains in the early 90’s. Asics has yet to invent a good shoe for running on ice. BTW..as Harry Callahan would say, “A good man always knows his limitations”. Just sayin’, friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You might change your mind by tomorrow morning!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s a good thing the snow that made you fall is there to soften the blow (a little bit anyway).

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Did you really have to go running – in Uggs, let alone with weights strapped on? Really? Take some Advil while you’re at it…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. One word for ya, pal: yaktrax! https://www.yaktrax.com

    Liked by 1 person

  7. P.S. Hate it that you’re playin’ hurt, but, as always, LOVED running with ya! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Ouch! I do get chuckle picturing you in all those clothes though! ❤
    Diana xo

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Nope. Stayed in, looking out the window at the layer of ice. Cooking. Watching old movies. Exercise another day.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. We’re all getting older. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Here’s a thought for your Christmas gift! “A treadmill” we just bought one and the whole family is loving it. We are running as fast or slow as we need, up the hills, down the hills all with a touch of a button ha! All in the comfort of wonderful cool air conditioning during the sweltering heat! Are you getting the visual here? No falls or wounds. But then again, what a boring story my running would make? Yes, on that thought Mr K, please keep running in the snow, you def will keep us entertained during this crazy season and I love your determination and writing!! Rest well 🏋🏋

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Sorry you fell…

    Liked by 1 person

  13. seems like it’s time for some trail running shoes; or perhaps a pair of snowshoes…

    Liked by 1 person

  14. I’m sorry, but I laughed out loud. Several times. Arnicare cream is good for bruises. Don’t know if it helps bruised egos….

    Liked by 1 person

  15. and tomorrow, another day, another rock. another chance to get up again.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I feel sooo guilty. First, I didn’t run today and have no excuse. 78 degrees and sunny. Second, I smiled. OK, I laughed. But just so you know, it was your writing and not the various hurts.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Yes…of course I did ☃️

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Well, shit.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I remember running in snowshoes, back in the day. Finally settled on x/c skis, which worked, so long as there was snow and not only ice. The weather is changing; part of why we moved to Hawaii. I need to be active, but prefer cycling over battering my lower body’s joints. Hiking is great, but I still love the wind whistling by as I ride my bike, plugged into a good audiobook 😉 Aloha, David. And good luck with ‘all that.’ 😉 Happy Holidays to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. It’s your fault for wearing Ugg boots…have you ever seen the videos? Too much cruelty for me.

    Liked by 1 person

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