Walking. In a Flash of White.

Walking.  @ Daybreak.  Cove Island Park.  746 consecutive (almost) days. Like in a row.

Fog. Dense Fog.  (Square alignment with mental state on 4.5 hours of sleep. Yes, we’re back b*tching about insomnia. And we were doing so good.)

No mystical Deer stepping out of the shadows. No Atlantic Gants preening. No Swans-A-Swimming. No Humans. And one Human rapidly losing enthusiasm here.  I adjust the backpack, strap on left shoulder biting. Damn, why so heavy today.

I walk.

The shoreline is layered in fog so dense, air brushes my face with infinitesimal droplets of rain.

My footfall sinks an inch or two into the beach sand.

I walk.

There’s a white flash.  It’s moving too quickly. Auto focus can’t lock in on her, can’t get a clear shot of her in the fog soup.

An Egret.  Legs tucked together tightly, platform diver, wings flapping ever so slowly, all of it keeping her airborne.  Miracle. All of it.

And White. Oh, so white.  Snow white against the all-world gray morning.  A palette no computer can replicate.

Why this white? This so white.

Why not black, or green or fuchsia? Why just egrets this white.  Why not all Birds-of-a-Feather be this white?

And who decided?

And I stand watching. Standing in the same fog. With the same heavy backpack. Yet, all of it is lighter.  Clearer.

Delia Ephron, in her “Left on Tenth: A Second Chance at Life“: “Out of this convoluted, mixed-up thinking, I manage to spin a little hope…I do feel that I was thrust into darkness and given back light. And it opened me up to feeling part of a larger world, I’m not sure why…Like everyone else, I have a time here and it will be over…This gift could be snuffed out at any moment.” 

The image persists… an old black and white photo decaying on its edges…the egret wing flaps…her legs elegantly tucked tight behind her, she flies. Lightly, child. Lightly.

This gift could be snuffed out at any moment.


Note:

  • Photo: Egret, this morning. 5:08 a.m.  Cove Island Park, Stamford, CT.  More Photos from this morning here.
  • Albert Einstein’s quote: “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle.
  • Aldous Huxley: “It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply. Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them.”

28 thoughts on “Walking. In a Flash of White.

  1. Beautifully poetic, David – even the bitching about insomnia. I think we have waves of this shite. Waves where we surf and all goes fabulously and then those times when we can’t seem to catch it. Sigh. I feel you, Bud.

    Yet, I had a similar moment during my run (from hell) this morning. Everything felt so heavy. I never got that groove. It was painful all the way through (and I keep asking myself why? Why are you even running, Rogerson?) I finally stopped, sat on a bench and just let the breeze carry in the scents of the lilacs, the sounds of the not-so-far-off highway, the rustle of the leaves and the singing of the birds. ahhh…

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      1. Awww.
        I thought you had tried again not so long ago? May I tweek you into doing a little. You know, I do intervals, just 2 min run 1 min walk… do a few sets. I’m by no means a runner in the true sense of the word!

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  2. Amazing how you bring us in to empathize with whatever good, bad, or indifferent you are experiencing. Interesting how sharing means you’re never alone! Loved finding the gosling photos…they’re both so regal and so fuzzily adorable.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Lessons that are sometimes so black and white, we fight their starkness. And yet, they can’t be denied or ignored – and in that we arrive at a tacit acceptance, perhaps.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Isn’t it amazing how a chance encounter can shift one’s outlook completely. I was in a bit of a mood the other morning when a little bluebird appeared at my window, pecking insistently, popping from one pane to the next, looking at me beseechingly. I half expected him to say, ‘Really, girl, get over yourself, get your bum out here and enjoy this glorious day!’ He was so persistent, for 2-3 minutes, that I finally had to laugh. That seemed to satisfy him…off he flew. Such a strange encounter and yet….☺️

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  5. the sheer beauty of your tale goes right to my heart. I have no reason whatsoever to complain (except maybe a serious lack of time as I’m looking after my nearly 99yr old auntie who is in rehab after a serious accident in March) and I CAN and DO see the daily beauty in nearly everything – so just THANK YOU.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. “And I stand watching” and We All Benefit !!! I am thankful for you sharing your gift of writing, as seen through the Gift of Your Eyesight…Each Breath is a Gift!!! /// I had 3 hours of sleep last night…we’re both in the lack of sleep UGH club…

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    1. Your comment reminds me of:

      Each creature is an energy system composed of parts or subsystems. Each has its definite place. Each is in movement, constantly changing and inevitably related either upward or downward, no single one existing in isolation. Energy passes down from above in ceaseless movement, like water spilling over a dam. This involutionary movement sustains life in a methodical, foreordained way. There is also an inverse exchange, from lower to higher, which depends on the factor of consciousness. All systems have gates to allow for an exchange of energies. For most, however, the gate swings only one way. Man’s unique position is that, for him, the gate swings both ways.”

      ~ William Segal, ‘The Structure of Man’ (via Alive on All Channels)

      Thank you Karen.

      Liked by 1 person

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