The worst possible thing you can do when you’re down in the dumps, tweaking, vaporous with victimized self-righteousness, or bored, is to take a walk with dying friends. They will ruin everything for you.
First of all, friends like this may not even think of themselves as dying, although they clearly are, according to recent scans and gentle doctors’ reports. But no, they see themselves as fully alive. They are living and doing as much as they can, as well as they can, for as long as they can.
They ruin your multitasking high, the bath of agitation, rumination, and judgment you wallow in, without the decency to come out and just say anything. They bust you by being grateful for the day, while you are obsessed with how thin your lashes have become and how wide your bottom.
~ Anne Lamott, “Prelude: Victory Lap“, Small Victories: Spotting Improbably Moments of Grace
Notes: Quote Source – Brainpickings. Portrait: Kamil Zacharski by Opaqueglitter
So true, love this David and for those who know they are dying understand why they need to live fully, and for those of us who don’t, we need to remember we are.
Yes, Karen. That’s it. Remember and live.
A beautiful and wonderful reminder! Thank you!
Thank you. Loved it too!
You can never go wrong with Anne Lamott! Thanks for the pre-workday reframe.
Yes, Anne Lamott is incredible…thanks for dropping by.
You can say that again. Human desire is so often for ourselves first and we never see what it is that is in front of us.
Yes Bill. So very true.
I just finished Gail Caldwell’s lovely paean to her friendship with Carolin Knapp, “Let’s Take the Long Way Home,” so this post hits a real sweet spot at the moment. And in this week of Thanksgiving, the ability to *recognize* one’s blessings is especially key. Thx pal. You hit it out of the park again…
Yes Lori. Recognizing one’s blessing is especially key. Thanks. Happy Thanksgiving.
I’ve walked with these friends in their last days who know they are in their last days. I’ve even been close to death myself, sitting with myself in the emergency room.
Yes, it’s the “worst possible thing” for my small-minded ego. It’s the best possible thing to coming back alive.
Thanks for the reminder – and may we all be busted this way.
Aren’t there enough conditions for us to be happy and grateful?
Vincent
There are enough (conditions) Vincent. Apparently I need the occasional reminder that there are. Thanks for sharing your story. Moving.
I love Anne Lamott. She’s one of my heroes.
Anne Lamott is amazing and grounds me every time I read her. You posted something recently that this ties in with…keeping a focus and an appreciation for the bigger picture (I had to to look, it’s: “We never think about the glories…” on 11/14)…and again, such an eloquent reminder about perspective.
So, I sit here and nod. And nod.
Smiling. Yes…I’m nodding too now.
Good…tandem nodding.
Sitting here reading in full agreement with the post and all the comments! Glad I stumbled onto your blog.
Thank you. Glad you did too!
this is very powerful. just live. yes. just live.
I know I’m late to this post (I’ve been away and am catching up). This reminds me of something I read that has stayed with me:
Student says to the Master, “I’m discouraged, what should I do?”. And the Master replies, “Encourage others”.
Love it Carolann. Thank you for sharing.