Man and his Best Friend

~ Live & Learn

funny-Inception-dog-Leo-DiCaprio-eyes

DK:
What kind of Dog snarls at the hand that feeds him? My hand. For no apparent reason?

RK:
Dad, you mean you haven’t noticed?

[DK: It’s the end of a long day. I lift my eyebrows, but don’t respond. Rachel assesses her Father’s reception and interprets the non-response as a green-light.]

RK:
Well, let me explain it to you.

RK:
You are both moody.
And wildly unpredictable.
You can go aggressive “at boo.”

RK:
You coming running at the sound of a fridge door opening.
You’ll eat anything.
You don’t share your food.
You wolf down your food without tasting it.
You slurp your soup.
You lick the bowl. And your plate.

[DK: I shift uncomfortably on the couch.]

RK:
You take long naps.
You go to bed early.
You are nasty when your sleep is interrupted.

RK:
You are overweight in middle age.
You are lumpy in funny places.
Your hair is falling out.
You have eye “goob” when you get up in the morning.

 [DK: I sit up straight. And lean forward.]

DK:
Are you done?

RK:
No.

DK:
And?

RK:
Have you looked in the mirror?

Notes:

 

23 thoughts on “Man and his Best Friend”

  4. Oh dear. I know how that one feels.

    Rachel has a daughter’s honesty. Mine (Emma) once told me “not to do that training shit in the kitchen” when I was giving her some useful insight into why there might be a conflict between her and her mother over some trivial item.

    Sometimes we are not as appreciated for our contribution as we might like, I guess.

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  5. Everyone’s already said what I was thinking, and Michael delivered the dollop of icing on the top, as is his wont. “don’t do that training s$&!# in the kitchen” will easily carry me through the rest of the week. Still giggling….

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  13. Awww…and LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! And, as for this:
    “You coming running at the sound of a fridge door opening.
    You’ll eat anything.
    You don’t share your food.
    You wolf down your food without tasting it.
    You slurp your soup.
    You lick the bowl. And your plate.”
    I GIVE UP…Jillian is done.

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