Sunday Morning

“In relationships, I’ve observed that a partner can start out as a friend, then become a passion, then a co-parent, a mother or a father of your children, and if you’re really fortunate, the partner remains—or returns as—a friend. It’s a lower-temperature take on a romantic life, but it’s enduring. I have been so fortunate. Great friendships can survive most of the crap thrown at them. They thrive on the manure of shared disappointment and drama. It’s hard to imagine a force as great as romantic love, but friendship comes close. Someone once argued that “friendship is higher than love,” and I understood what they meant. It may not be as melodramatic or grandiose or passionate as love, but friendship is often deeper and wider. Great friendships explain why we hold on to this life so tightly because it disappears so quickly. Just as Ali and I were becoming best friends, I was aware of the wider web of deep friendships we had both grown up in, this sacrament of friendship from the band to the community around us. Relationships we had chosen, not ones chosen for us by blood. Pandemics aside, I still embrace people when I meet them, which goes all the way back to the days of Shalom when that’s how we would say hello. I don’t know that I’ve ever shaken somebody’s hand without having to think about it. My instinct to hail a friend is to hold them.

— Bono, “Surrender: 40 Songs, One Story by Bono” (Knopf, November 1, 2022)


Photo: Bono portrait by John Hewson

Comments

  1. friendship is a mighty powerful force

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nothing quite like hugging a good friend …. Or puppy 🥰

    Like

  3. I don’t know how many virtual hugs I’ve already sent to Bono. Everything he says and sings sounds true and ‘real’…. such an amazing and rare human being.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. No surprise – I’m a hugger…

    Like

  5. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    BONO … “My instinct to hail a friend is to hold them.” — Bono, “Surrender: 40 Songs, One Story by Bono” (Knopf, November 1, 2022).

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hugging always feels natural (whereas a handshake not so much) and so many people live without that warmth. Way back when working with the “mentally ill” learning Movement, Dance, and Drama Therapy, I learned to ask for permission. I also introduced “massage” by starting with the hand–we had a group of about 25, ages 15 to 35. [Everything in my life seems to be bringing back memories–mostly heart-warming.]
    Thinking everyone needs a therapy dog!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. A man after my own heart. I’ve been a hugger all my life. Pandemic was wicked difficult for me. Now I’m back in my groove….☺️

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I might want to read Bono’s too.

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

  9. The Mexican culture hugs hello and goodbye; when I moved to my current town five years ago, I got some pretty big looks of surprise when I met new friends with a hug. The pandemic has been tough, and I still hold back because of that, especially now with flu plus COVID plus RSV…I’m missing the hugs.

    Like

  10. Lovely, fresh perspective. Thanks for sharing, DK 🙂

    Like

  11. And respect. Deep respect endures over time. Leave the sarcasm and passive aggressive insults to actors on tv. Neither will serve the greater good and intimacy that the incredible gift of loving and being loved by another will continue to nourish in their grateful absence.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: