Driving Kenilworth Road. With Intuition +.

Just another morning commute. And then, maybe not so much. Like a take from Hannah Nicole’s A List of Soft ThingsWatching a time happen and thinking, I will remember this.”

5:25 am. Tuesday morning. GPS estimates 15 miles in 21 minutes for the morning commute.

Traffic flows.

Body is rested. (For a change.)

Mind is clear. (For a change.)

Sirius 7 on 70’s fills the cabin with Johnny Nash. I can see clearly now, the rain is gone / I can see all obstacles in my way / Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind / It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright) / Sun-Shiny day / Look all around, there’s nothin’ but blue skies / Look straight ahead, nothin’ but blue skies.

I scan through the playlist for the Eagles’ Peaceful Easy Feeling. Can’t find it. Try to lip sync a few bars. Painful. I give up, and turn my full attention to the road.

I’m on the last leg of the morning drive. I-287 W, exit to the Hutch. I wait at the stop light. 0.3 miles from the office.

I wait.

Light turns green. And just at this moment, my skin tingles. Odd.  And then there’s a whisper: You might want to slow down here.

I’m take the sharp turn on Kenilworth Road and head up the hill.

This is where the story begins begin to crystalize, these handful of moments begin to slow, the images freeze framed. Click. Click. Click. Click.

I can’t see over the crest of the hill, the lens producing a bokeh effect, woods to my right are blurred, the road ahead is out of focus, the road feet in front is magnified.

I reach top of the hill, and it all slows. Click. Click. Click. Right foot jumps from gas to brake. Briefcase in front seat hits the dash. Water bottle flies out of console. Car comes to a halt.

And there she is.

Eyes full and glistening. Yellowish-brown fur.  Standing in my lane, frozen. Damn that was close.

So close, her nose twitches, her head seems to nod offering “Good Day” and she turns, fleeing into the woods.

I drive the last mile to the office at 25 mph.  Heartbeat slows. I knew something was there. I’ve made that turn, what, a thousand times? Never that feeling.

And as I enter the building, a passage from A.K. Benjamin’s new book pops in: “There is intuition, but what I am talking about is way below intuition. From down there, in the darkest reaches of the ice, feelings are all we have.”

I will remember this.


Notes:

  • Inspired by A. K. Benjamin ~ A. K. Benjamin, Let Me Not Be Mad: My Story of Unraveling Mind : “It, intuition is no more than a password for the small fraction of data we can’t quite keep up with (beyond the even smaller fraction that we can), as the sum of one another, of you and I, works through us with limitless nuance…There is intuition, but what I am talking about is way below intuition. From down there, in the darkest reaches of the ice, feelings are all we have.”
  • Photo: Tom with Up Close Close-up

 

 

Comments

  1. Oh, I bet you will….. what a tale! I had my stomach in my mouth, feared you were having a heart attack, and then it was a deer – oh the happiness – and so wonderfully told. Thank You. May you always travel safely and carefully!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This, this I love, pal. Our intuition is incredible, if only we can bring ourselves to make the space to listen…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Really is Lori. More from A.K.:

      “The brain is like a vast flowing river . . . like a perfectly conducted symphony orchestra . . . a giant colony of ants . . . the myriad currents of a great ocean . . . the ever-changing face of a beautiful child . .”

      ~ A. K. Benjamin, Let Me Not Be Mad: My Story of Unraveling Mind (Dutton, June 11, 2019)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. A good nights sleep clears the mind and leaves it open to such events.
    PS, I’m glad you didn’t have a heart attack 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Smiling…
    My skin is tingling now. Thank you for sharing.

    Intuition, the some of all of us, yes.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Glad the deer was OK, glad you were OK!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. That is indeed way below intuition… what a great tingle to have. And to have listened to it, a thing we all possess but do not pay attention to…
    So very glad you did listen and other than things flying about, none were hurt and you shall forever remember that you heard, listened and reacted…

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Very scary moment, especially when you think how it might have ended. Lucky for you both that you took care.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Wonderful, really wonderful – how we ‘know’ without prompt or cue…just that feeling – and when we pay attention – bam.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Relax... says:

    Sweet space between, that. And if another concept can be true in some way, maybe the soft golden doe-eyed is your spirit-animal.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. funny, my spirit animal happens to be a deer. primal instinct at work.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. The deer was sacred to the goddess Artemis, from Greek mythology. This instinctual energy that deer represent tells us to trust our gut reactions, because those instincts will tell us when to fight or flee. Deer also symbolizes a gentle, open heart that listens deeply and entices the lure of new adventures.
    What a beautiful surprise encounter! Who doesn’t love deer? 💕💚

    Liked by 2 people

  12. I also love the photograph of Tom … beautiful to know all is fine ☺️ smiles Hedy

    Liked by 1 person

  13. There’s the belief that we all possess this knowing. The task is to tap in and pay attention. I get fleeing moments of this.
    But this, for you, pure gift.
    Love Karen’s explanation.
    ♥️

    Liked by 2 people

    • Ah Roseanne. Yes. Thank you. Your thoughts remind me of:

      Look at the epic of your life, at the people in it, all heroic. And to think
      it began with an accident. Somebody looked up at the night sky and saw a star,

      — David Kirby, from “I Have Not Come Here to Compare Notes But to Sit Together in the Stillness at the Edge of This Wound” *Originally published in Poem-a-Day on December 22, 2016, by the Academy of American Poets.

      Like

  14. Glad it went well. Even living in rural NH for a while I never saw so many deer as we do living in the tri-state area. We have to be reallllllly careful!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Good call. In tune. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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