I get a base, primal satisfaction from actually just doing something, no matter how insignificant.

Posted on by Live & Learn

From spring until late fall, when winter weather drives me indoors to the treadmill, I spend 20 minutes each morning after my run around the Back Cove in Portland, Maine, walking the shoreline, picking up garbage. Every day is Groundhog Day — I gather plastic cups, syringes, food containers and cigarette butts the same as the morning before, and the same as the morning before that.I should almost certainly feel despair battling the daily fallout as late capitalism enters hospice care. But instead I get a base, primal satisfaction from actually just doing something, no matter how insignificant. We’ve forgotten, maybe, as the virtual world has slowly co-opted our lives, that we are meant by nature to move through and manipulate, to lift and carry and sort and transfer. Simple acts, I’ve found, have an outsized effect on the worrying over abstractions that otherwise takes up so much of my time. […]

The satisfaction I get from this habit is not uncomplicated. Sometimes I take paradoxical pleasure in getting dirty with other people’s trash, and other times the surprise dollop of last night’s honey mustard sauce on my shoe is enough to send me directly over the edge.

But the daily practice has taught me to be on guard against my own vanity — to notice and discard the smug feeling that sometimes arises when I see others enjoying the cove but doing nothing about how blighted it is. Instead I am confronted each day with my own fallibility, tininess and hypocrisy (as just one more trash ape among billions, I contribute to the problem simply by existing). And instead of puffing myself up, I check myself and reach for more garbage. […]

I go and gather garbage by myself most days. And occasionally something will occur that happily disproves my dim view of humanity. People will notice me, and wonder what I’m doing all sweaty and breathless down there among the marsh grass and the rocks. I present an intriguing enough figure for them to stop, in the midst of their preoccupations with the day, and take the time to discern what I’m up to. And when they figure out that I am, in fact, picking up garbage, sometimes — not often, but occasionally — they’ll come and join me. We’ll chat or, more likely, we won’t do much other than exchange hellos, or simply nod. Just a couple of strangers doing something small and futile together, for no other reason than that it’s right. The kind of modest, workaday miracle that feels like it could, with any luck, lead to something bigger.

It seems near all but certain that we are, as a species, too shortsighted and distractible, too enamored of dividend checks and retail therapy, to really turn this ship around. But, then, despair and idealism are two sides of the same cop-out, and I’ve indulged in both more than enough in my time. So I’ll keep splitting the difference, keep picking up trash — and keep hoping that simply setting an example can be meaningful.

— Ron Currie, Jr., excerpts from “This is What Keep My Eco-Anxiety in Check” (NY Times, October 23, 2023). Ron Currie Jr. is the author of the novel “The One-Eyed Man” and a writer for film and television, most recently for the series “Extrapolations.

25 thoughts on “I get a base, primal satisfaction from actually just doing something, no matter how insignificant.”

  1. I’ve been struggling to find the right words for a comment (this is my fourth draft), so I guess I will give up because I am not a natural writer and it would take more effort than I am willing to give. But the author of this article has already said it for me:

    “It seems near all but certain that we are, as a species, too shortsighted and distractible, too enamored of dividend checks and retail therapy, to really turn this ship around.”

    It breaks my heart to say what I really feel, but here it is: I am not optimistic that our species is willing to do what it takes to save the planet. And I see no solid evidence at this time to make me feel differently. All I can do at the moment is hope that we (as a species) wake up in time so that I am proven wrong.

  2. I agree that it feels good to at least ‘do something’ even if it won’t change things or make a dent in the issue, but being proactive really helps our souls, rather than sitting idly by, and watching it happen. and the times when others join him must feel like a small victory or joy to have drawn them in, in spite of all the other distractions in life. if you read David sedaris’ books he talks about how he is an obsessive walker/trash picker upper no matter when he is or where he lives, it helps to keep him sane.

  3. I love these musings. I, too, try to do small things that help, even if only in my own little sphere…picking up trash in our neighborhood when I walk the dogs, grab the random plastic bag that skitters across the grocery store parking lot, that sort of thing. If I zoom out too far, I am immobilized by despair at the uncaring, nay downright selfish, behavior I witness all too often around me. I share your worries that we are just too far gone. 😔

  4. Love! So inspiring. I do the same on my dog walk, albeit not as consistently as Mr. Currie, including picking up dog poop (with an eco-friendly poop bag, of course) that other dog owners have not. It infuriates me that some people don’t pick up after their dogs but the stronger emotion is wanting others, especially young kids and seniors, to be able to use the park without mishap.

  5. I was nodding in agreement and Paul – your comments were terrific! I probably fall into the bucket of those who ‘split the difference’. I want my recycling efforts to matter, despite knowing that at least half of it won’t be disposed of judiciously…I want financial donations to be used appropriately…I have gifted goats and chickens (which are always well-received) instead of standard b’day gifts with the hope that they can help both the individual and the community – you get the idea…I guess I am passionately holding on to hope despite the facts to the contrary…sigh

      1. Sorry – my hand slipped…anyway, these animals offer economic opportunities – learning a skill that speaks to the resources that can be derived from having such animal/s.

  6. Most of us don’t plan to live on another planet should that be possible someday, so this earth is our common nest (and for coming generations), and it’s sad fact that not all the birds give a damn (/yet), but the actions of those who do are as important as the nest itself, no matter how small or useless the actions seem. (I might not feel that way if I hadn’t mused more than once the miracle of magnifying a few loaves and a couple of fish into feeding 5000 fully and with 12 baskets of leftovers.) “Despair and idealism are two sides of the same cop-out” indeed. What a wise man!

  7. Ron Currie is a Saint… I pick up stuff too, but not on a regular basis (there is always enough rubbish to put away at home and outside). And just this morning when we drove home, we passed a woman in headscarf and sunglasses, peeling a clementine and just throwing the skins to the ground. I shouted at the closed car window and said: Yeah woman, do just as you do at home. Throw everything just to the floor, or out of the hut where you probably have no door…. HH was left at the steering wheel with open mouth. He said: WHAT?! And I felt so small, unkind, ugly, and yes, I‘m still not well and my nerves are raw. So, BRAVO Mr C. You‘ve got it sussed out.

  8. Small actions, compound…growing…His personal effort leads by example for those who witness and it is a gift to all, esp those who have no idea that there were discards, carelessly left by others…those who walk to enjoy the beauty are not distracted by the trash left behind…/// I don’t recall the last time I saw garbage on a walk…occasionally we see something in the road as we travel around town or maybe a cast off coffee cup in a grocery store parking lot…when we drive past the lost souls, who are un-housed the messy condition are shocking…its hard to know that others are without the basic necessities… His actions are Not Insignificant!!! ///He is in Portland, ME & I grew up in Portland, Oregon and what I learn by watching their local news & newspaper & what I hear from family…causes me to grieve about the violence, evil, the drugs, trash littering the public areas…the downfall gives me lots to pray about…

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