What is it we’re supposed to make of life? There is so much suffering–my own is a tiny stitch in a vast tapestry and many, many people suffer so much more than I have. What is it that keeps rising up in us even when we feel crushed? What keeps putting one foot in front of the other, or looks at the vague blue smudge of a sloe bush and is reminded of a truth that doesn’t even have a name? What is that? It isn’t me. It isn’t me that gets me up this hill each morning, but rather an irrepressibility that must be called life, life itself, a force working independently of my brain, body and mind. I don’t know what it is… What is it that is leaning forward in me now, towards the world? … What is it that dares to want to get back down this hill and go home and write? Or that wants to find out why things in nature are rarely blue. What is it that triggers the synapses that call to the muscles to work the body and keep going on? What is it that still insists on being happy? What is it that refuses the call of defeat?
— Samantha Harvey, The Shapeless Unease: A Year of Not Sleeping (Grove Press; May 12, 2020)
Book Review in The Guardian: “The Shapeless Unease by Samantha Harvey review – a good night’s sleep? In her dreams“
Live & Learn 
Samantha asks a lot of good questions there? But, a year of not sleeping? That’s a goal you’ve been training for, isn’t it?
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I want my badge for Mastery.
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Get in line
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Life’s irrepressible longing for itself…
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Yes. That mysterious life force.
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Intriguing questions and Lord knows we’ve had plenty of time to ponder such mysteries of late… I am finding it good in some ways, and incredibly distressing in others…
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Exactly. Right there.
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the will to survive is a mighty powerful instinct.
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it is that….
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Let me know when she has the answers…
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You are in a long line, and I’m close to the front.
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I hope the line moves quickly; maybe it’s just long because of social distancing…
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Ha!
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I’m with Jim on that one – or rather: I don’t even want to know…. This is clearly too complicated for a simple mind like mine.
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Ah yes. So self deprecating in her modesty.
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What? I am, in the heart of my heart, modest and simple…. I’m just camouflage princess!
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Oh Boy!
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Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
Really, what is it? … “What is it that triggers the synapses that call to the muscles to work the body and keep going on? What is it that still insists on being happy? What is it that refuses the call of defeat?”
Samantha Harvey, The Shapeless Unease: A Year of Not Sleeping (Grove Press; May 12, 2020).
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When I worked in an adult singles homeless shelter, I stood in awe of the power of the human spirit and its longing for life. Every morning, 1,000 men and women, woke up, stood up and took another step. Every morning. 365 days of the year.
Their lives were in tatters. Their hopes for a better future mostly dashed against the cold, hard pavements of homelessness and the harsh realities of life when you have nothing to your name but your body and your will to live.
And every morning, they got up and took another step and another and another.
That is the human spirit in action.
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Moved…thanks for sharing Louise.
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