SMWI*: Up Chubby. Up.

seal-gif-funny-jump


SMWI* = Saturday Morning Work-Out Inspiration. Source: Metamorphosis


T.G.I.F.: It’s Been A Long Week

round and round


Source: Gifak

 

My Breakfast

food-funny-baby-dog


Source: sjack959

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?

Caleb-camel-hump-day-wednesday


Caleb was in Central Park way before the horse and buggy rides showed up. Debra, from The Ptero Card, shared the following:

“I knew I had a more personal connection to Caleb. It was a long time ago, somewhere in the late 1960’s New York City. As you can see from the photo, I had to share him with others.”


Thank you Debra

The Joker

face-eye-portrait-black-and-white

It’s the end of a (very) long day, concluding with a work dinner. I drag myself out of the car, pulling my briefcase behind me. My shirt tail is untucked. My tie half undone. My shoes, dusty and scuffed. A disheveled, sloppy mess.

I’m hopeful that I can slither into the house and get a few minutes to myself. I enter. The house is quiet but for the soft murmur of a TV running on another floor. I slowly strip my shoes and socks, with my bare feet cooling on the wood floor. I’m in decompression. Hose me down with pure oxygen. Let Solitude rain on me.

And then.

There’s Thunder. Four legs storming up the stairs. Zeke’s bounding down the hallway. Dad’s Home! He wiggles in and out of my legs. Kissing (licking) my suit pants, leaving white slobber dripping from my crotch. Well that’s nice. Ah, just forget it. It just adds to your ensemble.

Susan rounds the corner. My Hummingbird spewing nectar all over. She’s talking. I’m listening. (Sort of.) The subject turns.

SK: Do you want some feedback? [Read more...]

Monday Morning Wake-Up Call

dog-sleepy-cute-adorable-puppy


Source: Thank you Carol @ Radiating Blossom via Sabon

SMWI*: Truth

diet-weight-funny-laugh


Notes:

  • *SMWI = Saturday Morning Workout Inspiration
  • Source: Chikita Banana

Saturday Morning

funny,laugh,sleep,saturday morning

funny,sleep,saturday morning


Source: wobblywibbly

Revving it up for the Weekend

Lion King


Source: summerlaughters

T.G.I.F.: It’s been a long week

funny-bear-gif-fall


(Note to Self: I know what the outcome is. How many times can I watch this?)


Source: gifak-net.tumblr.com

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?

camel-kiss-cute-funny


Look at my form!


Source: Inquisitr

First things first

coffee-funny-morning-work


Source: Thank you Assorted

Monday Morning Mantra: Ear flaps Up. Keep legs moving.

funny,happiness,peanuts


Source: NY Times from Charles Schulz’s Peanuts: Artists Edition Published April, 2014

 

 

Saturday Morning Work-Out Inspiration

cartoon-funny-elephant-jump-exercise


Source: indypendent-thinking

 

5:00 PM Bell!

office-funny-friday-TGIF


Source: Chikita Banana

 

Gaffe

funny-life-mistake-autobiography


Source: Living in Maine

T.G.I.F.: It’s been a long week

dog-cute-funny-dirty


Source: Magical Nature Tours

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?

camel-hump-day

OK, now this, THIS, is something special. Sandy, a fellow WordPress blogger @ A Mind Divided, shared this vintage photograph and explained:

My mom and dad travelled a lot after they retired from farming.  I found this picture of them from 1974 when they were in Morocco and immediately thought of you.

And look at Sandy’s Mom and Dad proudly posing with Caleb, who was just a baby…but had high voltage star power even in the early 70’s. Thank you Sandy!


Monday morning after a long weekend

hippo-close-up-funny


Tired, testy and feelin’ Titanic…


Source: Themetapicture.com

Running. With Gremlins.

running-black and white

6:00 am. 60º F. Light breeze. A Runner’s paradise. I’m out the door.

Mood Check: On a continuum of Bliss on the right and Rage on the left, the needle is twitching left of center.

It is said that, today, we live in a secular society, believing in worldly, non-religious, non-spiritual “things.” Just look at me. Every morning when I step on the scale…no matter what caloric catastrophe I engaged in the day before, I believe our Taylor 7506 Digital Scale is going to deliver.  This morning, was just another morning.  My cup runneth over. With belief.

A deep breath. A pause. One step up. Then the other. The digital read-out comes to life. Gremlins scurrying around with their algorithms. They’re flicking in a range from 208.5 to 207.8 and back. Why do you think they flick in a range? They didn’t use to flick in a range. Belly jiggling, so they can’t lock on? My eyes get large. They settle on 208.3. DAMN IT.

Ten pounds up in less than 60 days. If God was Good…If God was Great, this wouldn’t be so damn difficult. I’m drowning in temptation. Cereal. Danishes. Fruit and Cheese filled croissants. Ice cream. Pasta. And that was just yesterday. It’s raining on me.

And by now, you know what comes next: PENANCE. [Read more...]

Saturday Morning

saturday-dog-cute-funny


Source: Thank you Carol @ Radiating Blossom via fourfrenchies

5:00 PM Bell: Heading Home For Long Weekend

cute-gif-baby-skateboard


Source: Hungarian

Def: kar·ma (noun)

funny-sign-Karma-meaning-people


Source: themetapicture


Five Stages of One’s Career

balloon-portrait-life

Then there are the stages of one’s career: an old joke invoked the five stages of Joseph Epstein (supply your own name here): 1. Who is Joseph Epstein? 2. This is a job, clearly, for Joseph Epstein. 3. We ought to get someone like Joseph Epstein for this job. 4. This job calls for a younger Joseph Epstein, and 5. Who is Joseph Epstein?

~ Joseph Epstein, A Literary Education and Other Essays


Credits: Photograph – Tugbaumit

 

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?

camel-hump-day-caleb-funny


Miss me?


Source: Dubai by 

You were waiting for a sign…

waiting-sign-funny


Source: thedaybeforyoucome

T.G.I.F.: It’s Been A Long Week

gif-flip-head-sand


Source: Thank you Steve Layman

Just Livin’

ballet-foot-black and white

NS: Name?
DK: David K-A-N-I-G-A-N. No middle initial. (Here we go again.)
NS: Height?
DK: 6’1″.
NS: Weight?
DK: (Pause)
NS: (Smiling) We can weigh you when we get inside.
DK: Today or this month’s average?
NS: Today.
DK: 208. (She doesn’t know that you’re up 10. Why avert your eyes you coward?)
NS: Name of GP?
DK: (Pause) Don’t have one.
NS: Don’t have a GP?
DK: It’s been a while.
NS: Date of last physical?
DK: (Pause) Don’t remember. (She steals a glance at my ID. Checking DOB.)
NS: Blood type?
DK: No idea.
NS: (Staring eye-ball-to-eyeball now)
[Read more...]

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?

hump-day-wednesday-camel-funny


Source: Strangezoo.com

Some days, some days…

cute-baby-hippo-kissing-mom-water

…after a long day, you need a Kiss from your Mama


Notes:

Monday Mantra: Lead

dog-gif-baby-funny


Source: Gifak-net


A Letter to My Brother, Lorne. L-O-R-N-E.

APH___NOOGIE_by_Inonibird

Some things can’t be left unchecked. No Sir.

My youngest Brother Lorne replied to my post “I came that way. D0K” with this:


That was funny but don’t feel sorry for you. On a weekly basis I go through this. First name Lorne. Loren? No. Lauren? No. Lauryn? No. Mark? Mark…WTF! And the other day…Thor! Really? How our parents allowed you and my other awesome brother to name me I will never understand!!


[Read more...]

SMWI*: Abs. Come on People. Just tap tap. In the right spot.

gif-funny-exercise-belly


SMWI* = Saturday Morning Workout Inspiration. Source: Gifak.net 


No Sir. I can’t.

funny-quote-struggle

 


Source: QuoteLounge

T.G.I.F.: It has been a long week

photography,animal,


Source: Headlikeanorange (Young black-tailed prairie dog)

I came that way. D0K.

gif-connected

JB: Full name please?
DK: David Kanigan. David K-A-N-I-G-A-N.
JB: Full name please.
DK: David Kanigan. David K-A-N-I-G-A-N.
JB: That’s your full name?
DK: Yes.

(Yes. Oh, yes. I know what’s coming next. This scene, played out, over and over. Hundreds of times. Blood pressure clickety clacking up.)

JB: Middle name please.
DK: None.
JB: None?
DK: None.

(She lifts her head to look at the Alien. And pauses, wondering whether to push forward. Then, courageously plows ahead.)

JB: You mean you weren’t given one at birth? Or you changed your name?

(I look down. Two arms. Two legs. Flip flops reveal 10 toes. How many years do I have to take this sh*t?!)

(I look up. Smile. Which way do I take this? High Road. Or Low Road. I count. One. Two. Three.)

[Read more...]

Guess.What.Day.It.Is?


Caleb (alias Shaheen) makes his World Cup 2014 Prediction of the Day for the Spain v. Chile match beginning at 3pm today.  Don’t bet against this Emirati camel. Shaheen’s record so far is an impressive four out of five, and his only misstep was picking Portugal to beat Germany.


That’s Right!

funny-calvin-life


Source: Kulfoto

Related Posts:

 

SMWI*: Weight Loss Tips

weight loss,diet,  diet,exercise,food,weight loss,fitness,funny


Source: chikita banana. SMWI*=Saturday Morning Work-out Inspiration

T.G.I.F.: It’s Been A Long Week

tgif-funny-dive


Source: Animated Gifs

Tuesday for Teamwork: It’s all about a nurturing environment

teamwork,laugh,


Source: Chikita Banana (Kristen Wiig in Bridesmaids, 2011)

Yes, Really

funny-read-books


Source: Living in Maine

Running. Because I can’t stop.

gif-funny-cartoon-eating-diet

Wednesday: 2 am. A knife stabbing the muscle in the right calf. I’m gripping the iron railing on the headboard. And pointing my toes. (Susan’s remedy. I’ve always thought it was Bullsh*t, yet here I am pointing my toes.) I’m writhing in pain. Cramp. Zeke awakens, rolls over and starts licking my face, I’ll save you Dad! Dog mung-mouth-sleep-breath — I’m snorting ammonia. The bed is rolling like a stormy sea – yet, Susan is not moved. She stirs, but doesn’t wake. The entire team carries Lebron off the floor with his leg-cramps, and I don’t even get a: “Are you ok?” Where’s the empathy here people?

Thursday: 3 pm. Work meeting. Same leg. Same calf. Pitch fork stab. Cramp. I’m gripping the arms of the chair. Eyes are gushing water. I drop my head to take notes to avoid eye contact. Meeting ends. I walk up the stairs alone, limping, and heaving. Hydration? Vitamin deficiency? Sleep deprivation? Hunger?

Saturday: 4 am. Feelin’ large. I step on the scale. NO! Just.Can’t.Be. NFW! I strip off t-shirt and underwear – – I might be carrying extra poundage in my shorts. I get back on the scale – it wobbles – and falls 0.2 lbs. Pathetic! I move to the mirror. I see a six-inch scratch from the belly button to the jelly roll part, with a puff of dried blood accumulation on the handle. A tattoo from my wrestling match with Zeke. Or another sign? I check my notes. April 19th, is the last time I ran. 49 days ago. Can that even be possible? I check my weight tracker:

[Read more...]

SMWI*: This morning. Lookin’ and feelin’ like…

fat-cat-funny


Notes: Image Source – themetapicture. SMWI*: Saturday Morning Work-out Inspiration


It’s just this simple

laugh


Source: Themetapicture

Hump Day: Fluoride Baby. Fluoride.

funny,wednesday,hump day, laugh,


Source: Strangecosmos.com

Monday Morning Wake-Up Call: Shower Time!

bath


Source: themetapicture.com

Saturday Morning Work-Out Inspiration: This about sums it up.

pig-cute-1

Pig-cute-2

pig-cute-3

pig-cute-4


Source: la-belle-chikita

 

5:00 PM Bell: Get Shades On. Get Home.

funny-gif-dog-glasses


Source: Animated Gifs

T.G.I.F.: It’s been a long week!

disney-pixar-gif-up


Source: RinkyTinkytinky